As Oscar Wilde said, “I am not young enough to know everything.” And likewise the concept of a person being too concerned about eating healthy food, might have traction. It might just make sense in the context of my own life: I might be too concerned about my health, my bank account, my children’s activities, my carbon footprint, my automobile emissions, my lack of knowledge of the arts, my lack of knowledge of auto mechanics and on ad infinitum. Volley along now, I too might be the creator of a new DSM IV category: Dysplernecess.
Dysplernecess: Eating until it hurts.
Anyone with Dysplernecess has the unavoidable compulsion to eat whatever comes to mind without pre-conception or planning. When in a bakery they point to each and every pastery and state, “I’ll have one of those, one of those, oh, and one of those,” until the glass case is quite empty. They make up diagnoses, accuse others of focusing too much on healthy eating, and publish a book to prove their point(s).
Take the 10 point test to see if you qualify:
Two points for each yes:
1. Did you publish a book recently titled “Health Food Junkies”?
2. Is your last name Bratman?
3. Is the point of eating to achieve a pleasurable state?
4. If eating a twinkie is fun, would you eat ten?
5. Do you frequent all-you-can-eat buffets without remorse?
6. Does your waistline keep expanding?
7. Do you eat anything you like and not think twice?
8. Do you spend more than three hours a day thinking about new DSM IV diagnostic criteria to describe healthy eaters?
9. Do you feel a sense of achievement when you eat the most pie at a pie eating contest?
10. Has the rate of heart disease and obesity gone up in those around you?
A score of 6 to 8 you may have Dysplernecess. If you scored more than 10, you probably need to be put on a statin, have a treadmill test and get frequent blood pressure checks. Also; purchase a bathroom scale.
All tongue-in-cheek of course, but moral absolutists that consider watching what you eat to be a sin, need desperately to consider the trends. Where did the obesity trend come from? Answer: Not paying attention to what foods are composed of and allowing too much of said undescribed and tasty foods to enter the oral orifice. Where did the trend in hypercholesterolemia come from? Answer: See last answer. I could go on.
Dysplernecess: Eating until it hurts.
Anyone with Dysplernecess has the unavoidable compulsion to eat whatever comes to mind without pre-conception or planning. When in a bakery they point to each and every pastery and state, “I’ll have one of those, one of those, oh, and one of those,” until the glass case is quite empty. They make up diagnoses, accuse others of focusing too much on healthy eating, and publish a book to prove their point(s).
Take the 10 point test to see if you qualify:
Two points for each yes:
1. Did you publish a book recently titled “Health Food Junkies”?
2. Is your last name Bratman?
3. Is the point of eating to achieve a pleasurable state?
4. If eating a twinkie is fun, would you eat ten?
5. Do you frequent all-you-can-eat buffets without remorse?
6. Does your waistline keep expanding?
7. Do you eat anything you like and not think twice?
8. Do you spend more than three hours a day thinking about new DSM IV diagnostic criteria to describe healthy eaters?
9. Do you feel a sense of achievement when you eat the most pie at a pie eating contest?
10. Has the rate of heart disease and obesity gone up in those around you?
A score of 6 to 8 you may have Dysplernecess. If you scored more than 10, you probably need to be put on a statin, have a treadmill test and get frequent blood pressure checks. Also; purchase a bathroom scale.
All tongue-in-cheek of course, but moral absolutists that consider watching what you eat to be a sin, need desperately to consider the trends. Where did the obesity trend come from? Answer: Not paying attention to what foods are composed of and allowing too much of said undescribed and tasty foods to enter the oral orifice. Where did the trend in hypercholesterolemia come from? Answer: See last answer. I could go on.
1 comment:
WG, cracking funny!
A friend of mine suggested 'normorexia nervosa' as the name for a 'disorder' namely caring about what one eats. But I like your suggestion too.
I did not frame the orthorexia invention in moral absolutism terms. That would tempt me to revisit DSM-IV with a different lens and identify how many labels may actually be a result of such absolutism.
Thanks for this one.
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